ignorance ain’t bliss all the time

Posted: August 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

sometimes i can be so insensitive, it’s disturbing. i used to think that im keeping everything in moderation… turns out, i don’t. i can go to extremes but rarely in between. i can hit hard right where it hurts. and i won’t know the degree of damage i’ve caused til i see the casualty bleeding in my face. usually i won’t even care. that’s the thing with me. you go way past foul lines, expect me to strike back. don’t expect me to do a double-take or a check-up. cause once i storm off, i’m outta your scene. for months, years. however long it takes for you to heal. in absence, expect me to have gone on to new and different adventures. anything for a mean good vibes fix. by then, my system would’ve gone on to selective amnesia mode. bad vibes would be gone in a day, so dont expect a run-down of why’s or how’s when reconciliation time comes. nakalimutan ko na yun.

remind me then. i’ll love you for it.¬†retaliate when you know im on the stage of feigned ignorance. when you know im so defenseless, all i can manage is a few shrugs and an “im sorry.” because i truly am sorry. for thinking you’ve coped the same way i did. for not being there when you needed a friend. for forgetting. for the sleepless guilt trip nights. for being such a bitch and not knowing it.

and contrary to someone’s belief, i didn’t sacrifice our friendship over some guy. im not that stupid. if my memory serves me correct, it’s far more complicated than that.

best friend to worst enemy. i’ve been in both shores more than once. i should start being just a friend for a change. *sigh*


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