heartbreak rehab (december 2008)

Posted: July 21, 2010 in Uncategorized

it’s hard to see a friend cry over a recent break-up. the least i could do was be there and listen. that’s all anyone can do, really. the pain becomes this inescapable shadow of a presence, you become blinded by it. you suffocate yourself with it to be able to breathe. seeing her like that, or anyone for that matter, depresses the hell outta me. because i can relate.

heartbreak stories will always be part of one’s personal legend. it is exclusive to you and for you, alone. the how’s, the why’s are always gonna be varied but pain is universal. the degree of pain… well, i guess that’s a choice. how much pain are you willing to succumb to? for how long? in other words, ga’no katagal ka magpapakatanga?

3 yrs back -break-ups, heartache, any love ish- were all just pointless drama to me. now i get it. or at least some vital parts of it. i know how it is to hurt and be hurt. to be standing still in a blinding haze… seeing her like that brings in full view a flashback of how i was and what i’ve been thru during my own break-up episode/s. there’s nothing like the pain of having to move on when your heart’s still holding on, holding you back. the pain’s not a one time-big time hit. it’s so excruciatingly slow but it eats you up faster than your mind can register.

there’s not much i can do. and it hurts to be reminded that for every fall, you have to hoist yourself back up. as cynical as it may sound, that’s just the way it is. no escaping the pain, no getting around to it. you may have believed you had a good thing going, but good things -if it’s not for you- never last. so mourn. go crazy. for as long as it’d take you to finally wake up. and you will.

“so how are you?”
“heto, maganda pa rin.”

trust me, IT’S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.

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