free spirit (december 2009)


I don’t know when exactly I became this carefree. I can’t pinpoint the exact time and place and circumstance that made me not care about anything fleeting. Maybe I was born like so. Maybe we all are. I don’t know. All I know is at some point, I realized that everything in this world is fleeting, temporary. Nothing’s permanent. So where does that leave me? It’s either I choose to care for even just one thing despite it’s fleeting nature or I could just stay as I am -free as a bird, no strings attached. I’m pretty sure I chose the latter but I guess at some point, I don’t know when exactly, something or someone of a nonetheless fleeting nature, chose to care about fleeting ol’ me, which of course, made me care right back. I used to think that living, really living, means being as detached as possible from anything worldly; to be free to roam and soar as I please whenever, wherever; to be unbounded by fear and love and all it’s perils. I used to think that in order to live, you have to let live, to not give a crap about anything or anyone but oneself -that’s what it takes to be truly free. I almost succeeded on the basis of that ideal but then at some point, don’t know when exactly, something or someone cut off my wings and caught me as I fell. And ever since that fall, I was never the same. It takes a whole lot of courage and strength to choose to care than to be otherwise. To care, and I mean, really care, means going against your own fleeting nature for the sake of another. It’s choosing to stay grounded and rooted despite the relentless tugging of our spirits. It’s choosing to stay, period. I know I have yet to master that part. My spirit still has much hold on me, and maybe it always will or not, who knows? What I do know is that the human spirit is far stronger and more powerful than all the free spirits combined. And that is what we’re all trying to attain in this temporary life. To be fully human -mind, body, spirit, to choose to care and to be free enough to be cared for by another despite all uncertainties and the truth that it’ll all be gone in time.. This is what it takes to truly live. Otherwise, you’re just another story.

2010, I welcome thee with open arms and a smile. Lookin forward! 🙂


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